We're spoiled here in the US. Driving our SUVs. Eating fast food like it ain't no thang. Playing soccer on actual fields.
Now you have a chance to play the game the way much of the rest of the world does: right in the middle of the road. Legally.
The Greenwood Street Soccer Tournament happens this Saturday, and it's the official start of your fútbol career.
Closed off for an impromptu field constructed smack dab in the middle of its pavement, Greenwood Avenue will host teams of three players squaring off in 20-minute games for soccer supremacy.
The brackets are organized by three skill levels: "fun" for weekend warriors, "competitive" for ballers with a need to win, and "pro" for former college players and other serious athletes.
We can't guarantee scouts from FC Barcelona, but we promise you'll play in front of cheering spectators and absolutely no bloodthirsty soccer moms screaming from beach chairs. Winners will get trophies, gift certificates from local businesses, and more.
And since hops trumps Gatorade, Naked City will have a beer garden on site.
Because it ain't soccer without a pint.