We love our beer bars and whiskey taverns. But the new trendy beverage in town? Water.
Or at least that's the goal of Molecule, a new "water cafe" in the East Village where you'll find nothing but the dihydrogen monoxide so vital to Earthly life.
Is it artesian nectar from some mystical aquifer, painstakingly schlepped by Buddhist child monks from the slopes of the Himalayas?
Nope. Just pure NYC tap.
Molecule's owner — who has "a background in music and activism," according to DNAinfo — runs our city's chlorinated, fluoridated sludge through a $20,000 filtration system and sells it for $1 per glass jar, or $2.50 to go.
You can also opt for larger servings, up to five gallons, which Molecule will deliver by bike to EV residents.
Plain water too plain for your tastes? Amp it up with the "Immunity" blend infusion (one of dozens available) containing Chinese medicinals like the cordyceps mushroom — a parasitic fungus that turns insects into zombies before sprouting from their skulls like a chestburster.
On second thought, we'll take ours neat.
259 E. 10th St. (1st Ave.), East Village