Right about now, there's somebody in the French Quarter getting a harsh reminder that Hurricanes at Pat O'Brien's have a real way of sneaking up when one forgets to eat.
In Dallas, things are a wee bit more sophisticated, but that doesn't mean you won't find parties just as overindulgent. You just need to know where to look.
Here are Dallas' three best Mardi Gras doppelgängers.
5K, Masquerade, & Parade: Mardi Gras Oak Cliff
Beating up your internal organs with booze is far more satisfying once you've earned it, so register for Saturday morning's Dash for the Beads 5K. Reward yourself immediately at the afterparty, then again later that night at the OCarnivale Masquerade Ball. Despite the party theme, this is one of the most challenging, hill-laden runs in Texas. You can always stretch those overworked calf muscles on Sunday at the parade.
Sat & Sun. Full schedule, pricing, and venues here.
Crawfish, New Orleans Beer, & Jello Injectors: Big Shucks Oyster Bar Dallas
Get your fill of boiled crawfish, Abita beer, and injectable Jello shots at what could end up being the rowdiest celebration of all. Live zydeco music and free beads keep things legit.
Tue all day. 6232 E. Mockingbird Ln., East Dallas (214-887-6353)
Appetizers & Classic Rock: Ozona Grill & Bar
It's always a party on Greenville Ave., and Ozona always lives up to the promise of its location. That's why we'll forgive their very un-NOLA celebration with classic rock band KP & the King Pins getting people on their feet to dance — and hit the Tex-Mex appetizer buffet.
Tue 7:30p-midnight. 4615 Greenville Ave. (214-265-9105). $20.